Matthew PerryBiography & Memoir · Self-Help & Psychology·1969–2023
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
- Pages
- 272
- Published
- 2022
- Language
- English
Synopsis
In this candid memoir, actor Matthew Perry looks back on his life on and off the screen: the boy from Ottawa and Los Angeles who dreamed of stardom, the sudden overwhelming fame of playing Chandler Bing on one of the most beloved sitcoms in television history, and the decades-long addiction that ran alongside it all.
With dark humor and unflinching honesty, Perry recounts the highs of Hollywood success and the far greater struggle happening behind the scenes — the hospitalizations, relapses, and near-death experiences, and the hard-won lessons of recovery. He writes frankly about what fame could and could not fix.
"Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing" is a raw, funny, and sobering account of survival from a performer who made the world laugh while fighting for his life.
How it reads
- "And when whatever happens, just think, What would Batman do? and do that." This quote ended the book. It felt like such a positive and motivating light switch had turned on for him- making it bittersweet because he passed away less than a year later of publishing. Matthew Perry was so gifted. He had this incredible ability of making me laugh out loud while simultaneously wanting to cry. His description of his faith in God was so relatable. It was innately intertwined with a streak of bad luck circumstances (such as his parents divorcing and having to navigate co-parenting) and then lucky happenstances (like landing the role of Chandler Bing). His way of explaining his life experience on the roller coaster that is addiction and sobriety was so real, raw, and honest. There were moments of absolute humility describing embarrassingly personal issues like erectile dysfunction, constipation, and colostomy bag mishaps. Reading this book, his thought process was certainly a journey- one that you can witness in 45 minute intervals on shows like A&E's Intervention, but less self deprecating (aka Chandler Bing). I truly feel Matthew was a prisoner in his own mind. He reminds me of that squirrel from Ice Age constantly after that acorn- except his acorn was dopamine. There is a bittersweet relief that he finally made peace with being enough just as he was, but his addiction had a stronghold over his dopamine chase. I believe his brain chemistry was altered far too early in life. He was prescribed phenobarbital at only 30 days old for colic and took said barbiturate until he was 60 days old. I also believe (with profound evidence lingering in this book) that he struggled exponentially with self worth to the point of sabotaging every romantic relationship he entered. Enter self deprecating sense of humor.
- As a longtime Friends fan, my very biased opinion is that I love this book. Matthew Perry did a very good job at telling his story and shedding light on how devastating and life altering addiction can be. He spares us no details and I think his is an important story. Despite the fame and the money he was a lonely man whose childhood traumas led him to make so many wrong decisions and not live his life to the fullest. It’s tragic, really. I hope he’s at peace now.